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We all know the famous friendzone. We’ve all been in it, whether we like to admit it or not. You might have thought there must be a way of avoiding it but have never put much thought into it. If you are reading this, you have probably been there more than enough times, and you want things to change. Discover 5 ways to avoid the friend zone in the following article.
It is no joy to be the king of the friendzone. Being in the friendzone means you are being simply considered by the person you are interested in as a friend. This can be very frustrating when you would like to be something more than just that. It isn’t that there is something wrong with you. There is probably something wrong with the way you date and have relationships, though. The friendzone can be avoided through simple adjustments. We’ve been through them, and we can tell you they make a big difference. Once you’ve understood and realized what was putting you systematically in the friendzone, your life will get better. You will keep this knowledge with you through all your future relationships. The time you will invest in reading about this is worth gold.
1. Don’t wait for them to make the first move
A lot of people end up in the friendzone because they aren’t assertive enough. They wait passively for the other to make a move, and nothing happens. They then think that if the other person didn’t show any interest, it’s simply because they weren’t interested. This couldn’t be more wrong. There are a number of reasons why this person didn’t show any dating interest.
This behavior is quite common and is a result of fear of rejection. It is easier to stay in a kind of relationship where there are no risks, and where you are emotionally stable.
You have to be upfront about your desires. Don’t estimate what the other person will sense or not. Don’t be afraid of being honest with the person you are interested in. You might end up being distanced from this person, but maybe you will manage to stay friends. If you overthink it, you will pass by a unique opportunity and regret it.
Be bold and simply ask out your crush on a date. The key is to do this in the right time frame. There won’t be a perfect moment to do it. You should just do it whenever you feel there is some form of attraction that grew between you and seize it. If you wait too long, you are probably in the friendzone. It isn’t impossible to get out of it, but it’s certainly harder than if you never got in.
2. Keep a safe distance
By safe distance, we mean a distance where there is some kind of tension. If the distance is too big, then you are not on the other person’s mind. If you are too close and too open, then there is no mystery left. Being mysterious is sexy. This invites the other to want to know more about you. If you lay all the cards on the table, there is nothing left to discover. This can be tricky if you are trying to create a mysterious persona you are not really. People who have passion within them are also usually inspiring.
Make yourself available, but you also have to be able to capture their attention. This person needs to notice when you’re absent. By being too absent, she will stop noticing it too. It is all a matter of common sense and balance.
3. Make yourself attractive to the other
In order to make someone want you, you need to seduce them, comfort them but also attract them. One of the reasons why you are still in the friendzone is because you manage to bring comfort to them, but not any attraction. You have to have both in order to create a spark between you and them. The attraction will be one-sided.
Making yourself more attractive comes in two ways: physically and psychologically. Becoming physically attractive isn’t just about having an amazing toned body. If you don’t take care of your body but still go to the gym regularly you won’t be very attractive.
You have to show you take care of yourself; that you take the time to buy nice clothes, to smell nice, and have a good haircut. Self-care is surprisingly one of the most important features when it comes to attraction. Having a good posture is also very important. It exudes self-confidence, which is very sexy. These are relatively easy changes you can make.
There are other physical changes you can make that are a bit more difficult to obtain. Your fitness level doesn’t have to be at a very high level. You should maintain and take off your body though so that it has a generally nice appearance. Eat well, put on flattering clothes according to your body type, and stand up proud.
Regarding psychological attraction, you need to stay friendly. Avoid being negative, even if you are feeling down. It is unpleasant to be around people that are constantly bringing everything down, whether it’s their fault or not. Smile, be friendly, work on your personality. If you have a beautiful body but don’t know how to behave properly in it, it won’t matter anymore. Positive people are considered more attractive, regardless of their objective physical features.
By being too devoted to the other person, you are decreasing your chances of creating attraction. Having a positive personality is good, but don’t become a servant.
You need to be at least agreeable, honest, and generous to be attractive. But don’t become extreme in that regard either. It is not by fulfilling all their desires that they will want to be with you romantically. On the contrary, you need to create desire. If you work too much for the other, while the other one makes no effort, it won’t work out. There needs to be a balance in the time invested on both parts.
You want them to want you, so you need to create the impression it is not so easy to get you right away. Don’t become an asshole just in order to not get in friendzones. You will just end up in the douchebag zone which is even worse, as it is way harder to get out of it than the friendzone. Don’t adopt the nice guy or best friend stereotype.
This prolongs the idea of presenting yourself as attractive. You have to do this by showing you are desired by other people. It seems that people who are already in a relationship are more attractive to people who are desperately single. We want what is desirable, what seems rare and unattainable. It isn’t a matter of making her or him jealous over nothing.
You simply want to show that you are in the dating game and that you have success. This may seem counterintuitive to some, but it actually works pretty well. They have to realize that you are also an object of desire. This will make them consider you in their own fantasies. They will start rethinking how they see you and how they perceive you.
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